December 16, 2009
I reread the emails from him today. The tendencies to control and manipulate are so pervasive in his psychology that he can't utter a sentence in his defense without putting down somebody else.
To you, ghost from the past, here's how I'm different since the last letter:
*I am aware of the abusive designs of your conversation.
*I've seen that life can be so much more peaceful, stable, maneuverable and rewarding without your policeman-like presence.
*I feel hopeful about the future.
*Love will be a part of my life.
*I've picked up the pieces of my shattered self and handed them over to God, who's whipping up a new mosaic and guiding me to become that.
*I'm much stronger than before and not afraid to set boundaries. You step over the line? You get buzzed. I set that boundary, enforce it and walk away. If you're discouraged by that, you're not the type I want beside me.
*I'm closer with my friends.
*I'm grateful for the freedoms and possibilities of the USA.
*I cringe at jealousy and flinch at disrespect. My advice to women dealing with that is "FLEE! It's hard to think about but you will be better for it. You will have a chance at Life finally. Your mind was meant to be used freely. You will discover fear does not have to be a part of each day. You were designed to live in community. Say goodbye to suppression, intimidation, and isolation. Break free!"
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